Attachment

Resources

Decolonizing Mental Health Delivery with Melody Li (Part 1, Episode 227)

Decolonizing Mental Health Delivery with Melody Li (Part 1, Episode 227)

series with the founder of Inclusive Therapists, Melody and TU Co-host, Sue Marriott. We are pushing for more inclusive, anti-racist, and decolonialized practices.The conversation is  challenging but important as we explore liberation psychology that helps us recognize and unlearn patterns of thinking that are rooted in colonization and European Western education. You may not agree with everything this guest says but you will learn something and likely feel quite a lot. Discomfort is a necessary part of liberating ourselves from engrained traditional patriarchal and white supremist thinking that continues to harm so many. Don’t forget to help us reach our goal – if you appreciate TU, then please pre-order your copy of Secure Relating today & help raise the bar of secure relating in the world. www.SecureRelatingBook.com

read more
TU 2023 Year in Review: Building Internalized Secure Voices (221)

TU 2023 Year in Review: Building Internalized Secure Voices (221)

We explored many ideas this year and despite the variety of topics we found a consistent theme – nurturing secure relating in an insecure world. From interviews with our oldest son on the climate crisis to the power of awe in everyday life, we were met with rich conversations and endless opportunities to grow. As we close out 2023 with gratitude, Ann and Sue look back at important episodes from this year, review lessons learned, and exciting announcements to come in 2024.

read more
Healing Body-Focused Repetitive Behavioral Disorders with Stacy Nakell – Replay – (220)

Healing Body-Focused Repetitive Behavioral Disorders with Stacy Nakell – Replay – (220)

Hair-pulling, skin picking, and cheek, lip, & cuticle biting are self-soothing strategies that depending on the degree can become body-focused repetitive behavioral disorders. Learn about a new attachment-informed psychodynamic model for treating these painful, shame-associated behaviors in our conversation today with Sue Marriott and Stacy Nakell.

read more
Ditching Invulnerability: Embracing Our Most Authentic Selves (219)

Ditching Invulnerability: Embracing Our Most Authentic Selves (219)

While just the word vulnerability can trigger our defenses, it can also be a great gateway to secure relating and deepening the connection with our authentic selves. In a society heavily influenced by social media, unhealthy gender roles, and many other factors – Ann and Sue dive into the importance of changing the narrative and stepping out of our defensive invulnerable state and into our healthy, vulnerable selves. 

read more
Cultivating Secure Relating – TU Updates & Book Sneak Peeks with Ann & Sue (218)

Cultivating Secure Relating – TU Updates & Book Sneak Peeks with Ann & Sue (218)

Relating from a place of inner security is not about an attachment category, and it can’t stop with us as individuals. Ann and Sue share exciting news and community updates for TU. With secure relating at the forefront, this episode includes a sneak peek into the structure of their new book, Secure Relating Holding Your Own in an Insecure World. They explain the three R healing spiral, cultivating community, and much more! Now is a great time to join our online Neuronerd community www.therapistuncensored.com/join! Find shownotes at www.therapistuncensored.com/tu218.

read more
Attachment-Focused EMDR – Tools & Techniques to Heal Trauma with Dr. Laurel Parnell – Replay (216)

Attachment-Focused EMDR – Tools & Techniques to Heal Trauma with Dr. Laurel Parnell – Replay (216)

A theory around trauma is that when it occurs it “gets locked in the nervous system” and the way in which the body stores the trauma – in the form of thoughts, feelings, and bodily sensations – can be left fragmented, therefore delaying true healing. Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessings, also known as EMDR, is an evolving science that utilizes bilateral stimulation to help connect the left side of the brain to the right in order to form more cohesive, healing thoughts to better support the healing process. Tune in for this episode as co-host Dr. Ann Kelley and Dr. Parnell take a deep dive into the evolution and successes of EMDR.

read more
Attachment, Stress & Bootstraps – The Intersection of Poverty & Mental Health with Dr. Sharon Lambert – Replay (215)

Attachment, Stress & Bootstraps – The Intersection of Poverty & Mental Health with Dr. Sharon Lambert – Replay (215)

Attachment ‘insecurity” is partly a manifestation of unresolved stress patterns in the child and, by extension, the family. Therapists usually think of stress as interpersonal and dyadic, but you can’t isolate individuals from context. We talk about context a lot when it comes to attachment – the circumstances or setting which helps to understand a process more deeply. As Sharon Lambert says in today’s episode, you can’t “pull yourself up by your bootstraps” if you have no boots. Sue Marriott and Sharon Lambert discuss the unconscious bootstraps communities have that cause blame towards those who are struggling. www.therapistuncensored.com/episodes to join our premium Neuronerd community www.therapistuncensored.com/join

read more
In Each Other’s Care: Building & Sustaining Healthy Relationships with Stan Tatkin (212)

In Each Other’s Care: Building & Sustaining Healthy Relationships with Stan Tatkin (212)

Applying the relational sciences to real life is what this podcast is all about – and today’s guest is an expert in this area. We’ve invited Stan Tatkin to return for a discussion on secure relating and healthy interdependence. All humans are complicated creatures and if we spend enough time with each other, it’s going to get tense.  That part is OK, but what happens after arguing, disconnection or tension is what really matters. www.therapistuncensored.com/212. Join our Neuronerd Community for unique study opportunites at www.therapistuncensored.com/join.

read more
You Are Kenough: Liz Plank joins to unpack the Barbie Movie, Secure Relating, Gender Roles & Patriarchy (211) Bonus Episode

You Are Kenough: Liz Plank joins to unpack the Barbie Movie, Secure Relating, Gender Roles & Patriarchy (211) Bonus Episode

The Barbie movie has sparked great controversy so we invited journalist Liz Plank to discuss. Some are burning their Barbie’s and calling it “anti-man” while others view it as a strategic call out to the challenges both men and women face on a regular basis. We’ve learned to view the world through a patriarchal lens, so when it’s flipped only then can we see how those in power mistreat those who aren’t.  This is pro-anyone wanting secure relating and mutuality – all genders welcome!  

Ann and Sue are joined by Liz Plank to dive into the symbolism of the Barbie movie and how it applies to real life and secure relating. Listen now to explore patriarchy, masculinity, and the hierarchies of our society – and important steps we can take to build security through vulnerability for a more inclusive world.

read more
Working with Attachment Trauma Using Lessons from the AAP, Failed Mourning, Disorganized/Dysregulated Attachment with Dr. Carol George (210)

Working with Attachment Trauma Using Lessons from the AAP, Failed Mourning, Disorganized/Dysregulated Attachment with Dr. Carol George (210)

Sue Marriott and Dr. George explore her inspiration for writing her new book, tips for applying the information in a clinical setting, as well as deeper dives into concepts like failed mourning and the relationship with dysregulated attachment. With her decades of research, Dr. George offers thorough insights into the world of attachment, trauma, and building security.

read more
Secure Attachment & Recognizing Secure States of Mind with Ann & Sue (208)

Secure Attachment & Recognizing Secure States of Mind with Ann & Sue (208)

We’ve covered the different protection and connection strategies – preoccupied (red on the spectrum), dismissing (blue on the spectrum), and unresolved (tie-dye), but today’s episode is all about what secure attachment actually looks like in daily life. You’ve experienced the continuum from red, blue, or even tie-dye, but how do you know when you’re in your green? A securely attached system doesn’t mean you’re never upset – it’s about having the ability to stay engaged while you have big feelings.  In this episode, Ann and Sue discuss what this can look like conversationally, conditions that promote a secure base in parenting, and how to check in with yourself and deepen your connection with others.

read more
Healing Intergenerational and Ancestral Trauma with Linda Thai (Series SRIW, Ep 5, 206)

Healing Intergenerational and Ancestral Trauma with Linda Thai (Series SRIW, Ep 5, 206)

Linda Thai shares her journey of self-discovery as she navigates her own identity in the aftermath of unrecognized transgenerational trauma. She has dedicated her life to building secure relations within herself and her roots, and provides body-oriented healing using sheds light on the reality of unraveling transgenerational traumas. Through her various healing strategies, she reclaims the unresolved ancestral grief and trauma in her lineage and inspires others to look at our colonized systems through a different lens.

read more
Intergenerational Conversation on Climate with a Young Adult Homesteader (Secure Relating in an Insecure World, new series) Ep.202

Intergenerational Conversation on Climate with a Young Adult Homesteader (Secure Relating in an Insecure World, new series) Ep.202

Finding and maintaining connection and a sense of security in times of fear and general chaos is THE ultimate challenge.  This is a very special episode – co-hosts Dr. Ann Kelley and Sue Marriott are joined by 24-year-old homesteader Mason Marriott-Voss, to discuss navigating big generational differences and re-building a sense of security in an uncertain world. This is the first of the new series, Secure Relating in an Insecure World. See the resource-filled show notes for today’s episode at www.therapistuncensored.com/202.

read more
Exploring Internal Working Models with Ann & Sue (199)

Exploring Internal Working Models with Ann & Sue (199)

The care we receive in early development can be a strong indicator of who we become and how we interact. While it is mostly unconscious, our internal working models play a role in how we navigate our relationships with ourselves and others. Co-hosts Dr. Ann Kelley and Sue Marriott use neuroscience and personal narratives to help make this science digestible and applicable in our daily lives.

read more
A Client’s Perspective on EMDR with Dr. Deborah Korn & Michael Baldwin (198)

A Client’s Perspective on EMDR with Dr. Deborah Korn & Michael Baldwin (198)

Michael Baldwin is an accomplished leader in the communications industry with over 35 years of experience. Despite his many successes, after years of suppressing his traumas, Baldwin reached a breaking point. Through his work with Dr. Jeffrey Magnavita, Baldwin’s life was transformed by the power of EMDR. He wanted to make the science digestible for all audiences and created visual “billboards” for various aspects of EMDR. After teaming up with EMDR specialist Dr. Deborah Korn, the two authored “Every Memory Deserves Respect” – a book dedicated to helping others understand and heal their traumas. In this discussion, Deborah Korn explores the ways that trauma may go unnoticed, the ways it stores in our bodies, and common fears that are expressed when beginning the EMDR process. As an experienced client, Michael Baldwin is able to provide personal and meaningful ways that EMDR has improved his quality of life, relationships, and confidence.

read more
What Tiny Humans Can Teach Us About Adult Relating, with Neonatal Therapist Sue Ludwig (197)

What Tiny Humans Can Teach Us About Adult Relating, with Neonatal Therapist Sue Ludwig (197)

As a certified Neonatal Therapist, Sue Ludwig has dedicated her life to not only the physical development but the emotional development of her patients. Ludwig brings intentionality to each moment by strategically working to regulate patients’ nervous systems during their time in the NICU. Her process focuses on the interconnection of the mind and body and aims to support the child’s development in vulnerable situations. She explains the importance of proper technique to avoid disrupting the nervous system, and the long-term effects on neurodevelopment. Through her personal and professional journeys, Sue Ludwig has learned the value of being present in small moments to build deeper connections and experience lasting results.

read more
Addiction, Attachment & the Felt Sense Polyvagal Model with Jan Winhall (193)

Addiction, Attachment & the Felt Sense Polyvagal Model with Jan Winhall (193)

Jan Winhall provides new perspectives on the ways in which culture and trauma affect our navigation within the world. Using the bottom-up approach, she explains how addictions are regulation strategies and provides tools to connect deeper to our nervous systems, and ourselves. Follow along as Sue Marriott and Jan explore her “felt sense” model where she blends neuroception and interoception through a polyvagal lens.

read more
Relationship-based Parenting: An Integration of Neurobiology, Attachment, Regulation & Discipline (192)

Relationship-based Parenting: An Integration of Neurobiology, Attachment, Regulation & Discipline (192)

Learn powerful strategies for parenting even during the most difficult moments. Ann Kelley, Kat Scherer and Elizabeth Sylvester discuss ways of integrating attachment and neurobiology into disciplinary styles that work and build balance in our relationships.

read more
Secure Relating, Not the Same as Secure Attachment with Ann & Sue (190)

Secure Relating, Not the Same as Secure Attachment with Ann & Sue (190)

You don’t have to be totally healed from years of therapy under your belt or a history of secure attachment to develop skills for increased intimacy and secure relating. This is something that anybody, no matter their history, can begin to learn. Channeling your inner awareness to recognize a heightened state of arousal or using visualizations to help stay in a regulated place helps tap into your right brain to connect with yourself and your humanity. Ann and Sue navigate their personal examples, self-regulating tips, breaking out of their defensive “competitive head”, and many more useful strategies to explore the ways we can move in the direction of secure connections.

read more

What else do you want to learn today?

Get Your Modern Attachment-Regulation Spectrum (MARS)Bundle

3 videos, 3 handouts, and 7 podcast episodes to get you started on your path toward secure relating.

Success! Please check your inbox to confirm your subscription and access your starter pack.

Pin It on Pinterest